Love was a rollercoaster

Love was an electric

swift-escalating crush

yearning to see them again

desperation to be touched.

Love was butterflies at the thought of them

swarms of fluttering anxiety;

viewing red flags through rose-coloured glasses

recklessly ignoring friends’ warnings.

Love was a deep-dive intensified

by late-night confessions

shared trauma

promises made in haste;

divulging how others had hurt before

naively trusting this would not be the same.

Love was high-infatuation passion

a sense of being finally understood;

leaning on sweet nothings as crutches

avoiding asking tough questions I should. 

Love was a rollercoaster

thrilling highs

and drops without warning;

each time I opened myself up 

I broke my wishbone falling.

When it came knocking again

I told love I did not want it;

heartbroken, angry, bruising

I closed myself off from new darlings.

Love had other plans for me

but it would need to sneak in unsuspected;

this time, steeped slow and sweet

founded on steady connection.

Love landed again

in the form of a friend

flooding me with warmth

I thought I’d forgotten;

no late-night secrets or lofty promises

just two companions, talking.

This love, steadfast and sure

made known their feelings for me;

they gave me a soft landing place to 

heal anxious, avoidant tendencies.

My love, choosing you

was still a cliff-dive of the heart kind

terrifying to take a chance on;

but when the words

“I’m in love with you” tumbled out,

your lips were there, ready to catch them.

Today, love builds our own unintelligible language;

I don’t get lost in someone else’s world 

instead, we build ours together.

Loving you

cracked me open emotionally;

made me tender in a way

I never knew I could be.

Love was a rollercoaster

and I used to think

that was all it could be;

but these days,

I have passion and peace

and I would choose that over anything.